Amazing Grace
24/07/12 21:45
On the way to radiation treatment, I pull up behind a van at a stop light. On the right is St. Thomas Episcopal Church. I read a bumper sticker on the van, “Pipers do it with amazing grace” and I chuckle at the phrase. I remember that at the Episcopal church I belonged to in Akron, on Rogation Sunday bagpipers would come into the church and play “Amazing Grace.”
As I put these pieces together in my mind - church, bagpipers, amazing grace - it takes only seconds - at that moment the voice on the radio says, “Amazing Grace.” Who is talking to me?! The voice goes on to recite the verses of the hymn. I realize it is Garrison Keillor and The Writer’s Almanac program. Today is the birthday of John Newton, and “Amazing Grace” is the poem for the day. After that program, WXXI plays an instrumental version of the song.
It feels like a message, like divine timing. I am lit for the day with amazing grace.
As I put these pieces together in my mind - church, bagpipers, amazing grace - it takes only seconds - at that moment the voice on the radio says, “Amazing Grace.” Who is talking to me?! The voice goes on to recite the verses of the hymn. I realize it is Garrison Keillor and The Writer’s Almanac program. Today is the birthday of John Newton, and “Amazing Grace” is the poem for the day. After that program, WXXI plays an instrumental version of the song.
It feels like a message, like divine timing. I am lit for the day with amazing grace.
A Little Denial
08/07/12 20:57
A little denial can be a good thing. I found I couldn’t deny that I had breast cancer, or that I needed the chemotherapy. But I could, and did, deny that this disease would be the defining part of my life. That’s why after one visit I chose not to participate in support groups. I saw that they would foster identification with the disease. My life was not / is not breast cancer.
My life was, as it is now, my creative life, my spiritual life, my family and friends, my job. I had to accommodate some of that to the fatigue that came with treatment, but I continued to work full time and made time at home for some positive and creative work, even if in small increments.
I am blessed that the lab tests after surgery showed no cancer! I look on this as a multi-tier healing: physical, mental and spiritual. And an important part of my contribution to that healing was my denial of the dominion of disease.
My life was, as it is now, my creative life, my spiritual life, my family and friends, my job. I had to accommodate some of that to the fatigue that came with treatment, but I continued to work full time and made time at home for some positive and creative work, even if in small increments.
I am blessed that the lab tests after surgery showed no cancer! I look on this as a multi-tier healing: physical, mental and spiritual. And an important part of my contribution to that healing was my denial of the dominion of disease.
